Thursday, May 29, 2008

Feeling like a bad mother

So I know its normal for kids to get sick...

but TWICE in less than one month of life? I am feeling negligent.

A few days ago Avery got a little rash, but it looked like the regular newborn rash, so I didn't worry too much. Then she got a little fever, but it was so low that I knew if I took her in they would just tell me it was probably a virus (and nothing hey could do), and it only lasted one day so I felt better. But she was just acting funny and I was bugged by it. Tuesday she didn't sleep the ENTIRE day, which is bizarre for a one month old baby. She wasn't fussy crying...just fussy restless. So this little voice in my head wondered about her ears, but I kept telling it that I was being overly worried and to hush. But the worrier in me won out and after a full 24 hours with hardly any sleep and at my husband's insistence, I took her in to the Doctor yesterday, and sure enough, she has an infection in both ears! Poor little thing. I don't know how she keeps getting sick but I feel awful! I hate that my newborn has to be on antibiotics that will most likely give her a wicked diaper rash, and that her little tiny ears hurt and that I am obviously not doing a very good job of keeping germs away.

So I have decided we are officially not taking her out for a while. We are going to be hermits. Not that I could leave anyway...because she basically will only sleep if I am holding her at this point. And if you happen to visit us...please don't be offended if I force you to use hand sanitizer... or appalled at the state of my messy house...or annoyed that you still haven't received a thank you card etc. I am typing one handed after all.

Also, we got all of her newborn pictures back. They are so cute. I can't wait till I have time to do something fun with them.

until then...


  1. I'm impressed at the length of your one-handed post. So sorry Avery is sick again . . . but don't feel guilty!

    Those pictures are adorable.

    And I may have spoken to soon about Zoe not being gassy. I don't know whether it's gass, but she's been getting more fussy lately. So I've decided to go off dairy for a while and see if that helps. It's hard to figure out what to eat. But rice milk is quite good.

    Ditto on the hand sanitizer and messy house.

  2. Oh my Danielle - not ear infections. Yikes, did Travis ever struggle with those!

    And lets just get one thing straight right now. You are not a bad mother because Avery is sick. Babies get sick. What makes you the fantastic mother that you are is that you respond to her needs. You help her and take care of her when she gets sick. You recognize when she needs medical help. If she can only sleep in your arms, then you hold her. You are a wonderful mother!

    Love the pictures!

  3. By the way, I know it's "gas," not "gass." Sleep deprivation?

  4. Oh, I hope Avery feels better soon! Love the photos--she's beautiful!

  5. My month old baby girl also had an ear infection and come to find out it was caused by when I would nurse her I didn't have her head elevated enough so fluid was getting trapped behind her ears. So maybe that is what happened to Avery.

  6. You are anything BUT a bad mom!! I'm pretty sure ear infections are more genetic then anything. (but then again what do I know about this kind of thing, your the nurse) The girls I nannied all had tons of ear infections (there were 4). Melanie (the mom) said they've always had them. I haven't ever had one. So don't think it's your fault, like Colleen said, Trav had a hard time with them. So maybe that's why little Avery is struggling. I just hope she isn't sick from visiting us!! I just held her once (with scrubbed hands). Hopefully we'll see you again someday! Everyone here is healthy...

    I've been meaning to call you but the weeds in my yard are winning most of my attention. Lame. The pictures are DARLING!!

    I hope more sleep comes soon!

  7. Oh, heavens! Don't feel like a bad mother. Poor little Avery, having to deal with all this illness in the first month of life -- a harsh welcome to mortality, I say. I think being a little hermit-ish is a good idea (so is the hand sanitizer.) Call me if you need a little dose of social-ness during your hermit spell. Love you.

  8. oh my gosh! That is the saddest thing ever! You must be an exhausted mess. Yes, be a hermit, especially don't go to church. You deserve it.

  9. She is so cute! It sound like this ear infection is bacterial and may not have been prevented. I am sorry she is not sleeping. That is the pits.

    A messy house???I am glad I am not the only one. I think I gave up on that a long time ago. Especially when they can dump out laundry you fold up, toys, all of the clothes out of a dresser....
    Some times it is fun to see how many minutes it will take for the house to become a total disaster area again.

  10. daniellie, i think avery just inherited your weak immune system. it isn't your fault she is sick! she is a lucky baby because you are a smart nurse and know just what to do. and i don't think anyone would mind if you quarantined her much less pushed the hand sanitizer. love you both. ness

    p.s. my room is a mess and i don't even have a sick baby.

  11. Please. You are not a bad mom. You are a fabulous mom--and I should know; I see a lot of moms! Avery is just building up her immune system now so she doesn't have to get sick later on! You are doing everything right. (This is from your doctor Al, friend Al). We should get together this month. I promise I will wash my hands.


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