Oprah does it to me again

All I really need
(coincidentally, I bought this outfit that she is wearing 3 years ago in anticipation of someday having a sweet baby girl...some purchases are really worth it.)

So my husband was out of town this past weekend. I didn't want to stay home all day for the four days he was gone, and so I found myself doing a lot of shopping. One particular outing was to a local craft show of sorts with my cute friends Kate and Heidi. I had set aside a particular sum a money to spend ahead of time, and found that I had spent it astonishingly fast. I came across two darling purple plaid pillows that just spoke to me. I loved them, but as I had spent my money, I stuck to my guns and put them back.

So later that night I started gazing at my couch and thinking about how perfect those pillows would be. I became obsessed. I fantasized about how I could decorate accordingly. And it wasn't just that the pillows were cute....but that they were just so me. I had to have them. I spent hours on the internet searching for the perfect purple plaid fabric, but to no avail (which by the way...I still can't believe!). I tried to sleep but I couldn't (not kidding). So I got out of bed and back to the internet where I managed to track down the girl who was selling the pillows and discovered gleefully that she had an Etsy shop. I emailed her and said a prayer that the pillows had not sold.

They hadn't, I found out Monday morning. And so of course I bought them immediately.

I occasionally watch Oprah when there is a topic that I feel enlightening or beneficial in some way. Sometimes it's Gwyneth Paltrow and Spanish cooking, yesterday it was Suze Ormon and the economy.

Here's the thing. I know there are many many families out there who are facing scary things like job loss or losing their homes, due to the current financial market and our economy. I feel terrible for those families and don't mean to minimize their situation at all.

Trav and I have been pretty careful with how we spend our money for the most part. We have followed our parents good example of living within our means, and so we feel pretty secure despite all of the financial chaos. But watching this show, and listening to Suze's strong words about respecting money etc., did make me think about why I spend the money I do spend.

I happened to glance over from my perch on the couch to a pile of half-unpacked boxes in our still packed basement. I saw sitting on top a pillow that I had saved away for years because I might need it some day. I remember buying it almost ten years ago. I was in high school. I had spent a large chunk of my (at the time small amount of) money on it...because you know...it was just so me, that I had to have it.

I brought the pillow upstairs and placed it on the couch where I had sat obsessing about the purple plaid just days ago, and sort of sickeningly realized that this pillow might actually work even better there. hmm.

Ok so not the end of the world. But it did get me thinking. Why is it so important for me to buy things that I feel show the world who I am? I am not a shopaholic...in fact I can tend towards frugal in some aspects of purchasing. But not when it comes to things that I feel somehow define who I am. I will justify and splurge when it comes to acquiring stuff that reflects my thoughts or feelings or dare I say, style. Put a piece of milk-glass or a vintage jar in front of me and there is no price too high.

Obviously we need to buy things. This is not a rant against materialism...in fact I love materials...all of them. But what I hope that I do in my life, is show the world who I am by the things that I do, and not the things on my shelves. I hope that when all is said and done, the people I form relationships with feel that the things like, kindness, selflessness, nurturer, and good mother, are so me... instead of throw pillows. That is what I aspire to.

As I watched Suze Ormon tell overextended families that they needed to sell their house and cars immediately, I sort of checked myself internally. I gratefully and calmly felt that if our family were left without things, and only with each other, and as long as were safe and fed, we would be happy and thriving.

Because as Donavon Frankenreiter sang to me as I cleaned my craft room yesterday, "Getting more of what we don't need--It don't matter".

We should really listen to surfers more often...they are so wise.